Transforming Your Relationship with Time: Strategies for Personal and Professional Growth

Struggling with a disordered relationship to time can hinder both personal growth and professional success. In this post, you will discover how to navigate and transform these challenges into opportunities for improvement.

“I have so many ideas. I can't get any of them done.”

“I feel like I’m so behind everyone else.”

"I am entering my busiest season and I’ve put so much pressure on myself that  feel guilty when I take a break to watch a show at night.  I feel like I should be doing something for my business.

Can you relate to any of the above statements?  (These all came out of a recent coaching call inside the Impact Incubator-- our year-long mentorship program to help consultants, coaches, and experts leverage their time and maximize their impact & INCOME.)

  • Too many ideas?

  • Feeling behind?

  • Feeling guilty if you’re not always working?

What do all these feelings of “stuckness” have in common?

They are all about our relationship to time.  So it got me thinking…what’s been MY relationship with time through the years?

How My Relationship to Time has Affected my Life

I can tell you, my relationship to time has been often been disordered, AT BEST.

That feeling of scarcity– that everyone is way ahead of me, that I have so many things to do and not nearly enough time to do them, that I’m taking too long on projects, or I’ve wasted my time on things that didn’t pan out. Not enough time to rest, or play, or relax.

Lots of guilt.  Lots of resentment.  Lots of anger. And No Time Management Strategies in Place.

And because I’m not one to stay in a situation and complain, I’ve done A LOT of work through the years, especially since becoming a mom (because holy moly motherhood and business ownership bring EVERYTHING that needs healing to the surface, doesn’t it?) to create the kind of relationship with time that allows me a life of more peace and freedom– my core desires.

Here’s how I committed to change:

When I start to feel that stuck-ness, I recognize it in my body.  It feels like tightness in my chest.  Like I can’t move in any direction.  Like I’m standing in quicksand.  It’s quite uncomfortable.  I have to REMIND myself to breathe:  One hand on my heart, one hand on my belly, feet on the ground, butt in a seat.  Deep breaths in and slow breaths out until I’ve regulated and grounded myself in the present moment.

Then, I repeat to myself as many times as necessary to move in the direction of a solution (sometimes it takes days, I’m not going to lie…)  

“I’m in exactly the right place at exactly the right time to learn the thing I need to learn in this moment.  I’m in exactly the right place at exactly the right time to learn the things I need to learn in this moment.”

This helps me remind myself that even in the yuck, there are lessons– that I don’t have to have it all figured out BEFORE I start toward a solution– any baby step in any direction toward the life I want is enough.

This is what works for me, and what I encourage you to do if you’ve found yourself in an unhealthy relationship with time:

1. Identify: what you want to feel in your life.  For me, I want to feel expansive, free, joyful, abundant, full of purpose, present, and like I’m contributing to the greater good. What do YOU want to feel?  Do you feel that way?  If not, move on to the next step.

2. Determine: What needs to change in order for me to feel those things above? What would do I need to START doing?  What do I need to STOP doing?

3. Examine:   I look at my calendar.  What is my time currently going to?  Where can I make more space to align my calendar with how I want to feel?  Those things I need to STOP doing– can I delegate? Can I say no more often? Can I release them all together?  And the things I need to START doing in order to get to the way I want to feel– where can I start prioritizing those things?  What small pockets can I commit to on my calendar to make a move in the direction I want to go in?

4. Commit: Now that I’ve re-prioritized my calendar, what do I need to do to commit to keeping those times sacred and not swallowed up by the “have tos” or “shoulds?”  What ways will I celebrate when I keep my commitment to myself? Who else do I need to enlist to make these commitments happen? (A coach?  A housekeeper? A babysitter?  A virtual/personal assistant?  A partner? Your kids?)

Granted, this is not an overnight process, but you can absolutely start immediately.  It will take practice and dedication to see a result– just like any change does.

But you’ve got it in you.  I know it. Because we aren’t designed to be scarce beings.  We are made in the image and likeness of all that is good and abundant.  Time. Money. Beauty. Love. Peace.

Reshaping your relationship with time isn't just about finding more hours in the day; it's about creating a life that aligns with your values, ambitions, and well-being. The journey towards this transformation may require introspection, adjustment, and commitment, but the outcome—a life marked by freedom, purpose, and peace—is undeniably worth the effort. Remember, you possess the power to redefine your interactions with time, ensuring they propel you toward the fulfillment and success you deserve.

Feeling inspired to take control of your time and maximize your impact and income? The Impact Incubator is here to guide you through every step of this transformative journey. Join our community of like-minded professionals, and let's turn your aspirations into reality. Reach out to us today to learn more about how the Impact Incubator can support your growth and success.

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